Squirrel Vs. Monkey

Who would win in a fight, a squirrel or a monkey?

It's a very simple question with a very complicated answer. Actually, there is no answer. Well, there is, but there's no right answer.

Mylla's friend Cupcake (the quarter brother) asked me this one time when I called Mylla. I said squirrel.

"But a monkey can fling it's own crap," Cupcake pointed out.

"But a squirrel can tear the monkey's eyes out with it's claws (this wasn't a voilent conversation, I assure you). Plus a monkey only has only so much feces."

This is an ongoing arguement. Who would win? I hold my beliefs on a squirrel winning.

Pros of a squirrel:

• They can run really fast
• They can climb things, including the monkey
• They have sharp claws and possibly sharp teeth, but I have never stuck my hand in a squirrels mouth to find out, so I can't know for sure
• They can run for a while
• They never die (refering to the squirrel Scout in Ice Age)
• They can throw their nuts

Cons of a squirrel:

• They have virtually no strength
• Once caught by monkey their screwed
• If poop hits them they'll probably die
• They might have rabies and die anyway
• Chances are if they aren't killed by a monkey, they'll get hit by a car

Pros of a monkey

• They can jump from tree to tree further than a squirrel can jump (unless the squirrel can fly)
• They have a tail to hold things, and their feet and hands can also
• If they grab the squirrel they can easily kill it
• They can scream for their friends to show up
• They can throw poop
• Their smell might kill the squirrel

Cons of a monkey

• They can run out of poop, which is basically their only offance
• They can't outrun a squirrel, or catch it
• From the looks of them they don't have exceptionally high reflexes
• They might get distracted by their fleas, or their friends fleas aka a snack
• They can't compete with a squirrels cuteness (in my humble opinion)

As you can tell, I am extremely bored.